Karma Page 4

  “The cold is good,” Abby finally answered his question.

  “Thank you.” He kissed her again. “Just let me know if you want me to change anything. Or if you want more or less pressure. Let yourself fall asleep if you can. I won’t be offended. I’ll tell you all about my friends again so don’t worry if you miss something.”

  “Okay.”

  Jesse massaged her neck and shoulder. Her muscles were even tighter than he remembered Holly’s ever being. No wonder she was so pale. In the hour since they got to the hotel, she had only opened one eye at a time, clearly unable to focus. He was amazed that she was functioning at all but decided that it was just another indication of how much she usually fended for herself. While his hands moved, he spoke softly of how he first met Jordan and the rest of his friends. He told her of how Jordan and Kiley got together. He explained how he had observed Shane and Alyssa when they first met and how much they antagonized each other at the time. He said he’d save the details of his job for another time. When he started talking about Brett and Andie, she turned her head to look at him.

  “You’re the friend. The one who didn’t give up. On the radio.”

  “Yep, he was talking about me. Brett had a rough stretch but he has his life back on track now.”

  “I like to listen to Jordan’s show but I don’t always get to. I heard all of it that night. I couldn’t stop crying.” Abby was referring to the night Jordan had dedicated to his young friend, Max, after the boy had died. “They got back together?”

  “Yes, a few weeks later. I guess you weren’t listening the night Brett called to thank Jordan and all his other friends for their help. He wanted Jordan’s audience to know everything worked out for him and reminded everyone to follow their hearts.” Jesse had worked his way down her arm and was rubbing her hand. “I know I said I’d wait for you to want to talk but I can’t help asking one question.”

  “Okay.”

  He stroked her ring finger. “You wore a ring until very recently. I can tell by the line here. Is he your husband?”

  Abby sighed, the tension returning to her features. He hated it but he had to know.

  “No. Fiancé. Or Ex-fiancé, I mean.”

  “Good,” Jesse declared. “Then we won’t have to wait around for you to get divorced.”

  “D-divorced?” He could tell Abby’s heart was racing and suspected it wasn’t from her headache.

  “Aw, damn. I guess I really did say that out loud. Sorry. Let’s just pretend I didn’t for now, okay?”

  Abby sat up suddenly and swung her legs off the bed. “I have to go to the bathroom. Alone.”

  Jesse hung his head into his hands. He was such an idiot! This girl was in no condition, either physically or mentally, to hear what was going on in his head. She had enough to deal with without his blurting out things like that, even if it was what he was honestly thinking.

  Jesse was about to go tap on the bathroom door to attempt to talk her out when it opened. She hadn’t grabbed the robe when she rushed away from him so she was trying to shield her breasts from his sight. She was clearly unaccustomed to walking around mostly naked but the expression on her face kept Jesse motionless.

  “I’m sorry,” Abby stated when she stood in front of him.

  “For what? I’m the one with the big mouth. The last thing I want to do is scare you and I’m afraid what I just said did.”

  “A little,” she admitted, not meeting his eyes. “You said you wanted me and now you said that and I don’t understand. You don’t have say things like that. I know you can tell that I’m a mess but I don’t expect you to fix this. I didn’t expect anything more than you telling that awful man that I wasn’t pulling some sort of joke on him earlier. I really don’t understand any of today but I shouldn’t have run away like I just did. You’re being very kind to me and I believe you aren’t going to hurt me. So I’m sorry.”

  “Abby, when you feel better we are going to have a long talk.” Jesse pulled her into the space between his legs and put his hands on her waist. He caressed her skin with his thumbs. “I know it hurts but please look at me.” He waited for her to raise one eyelid. “You don’t understand why I want you and I don’t understand why you don’t think I should. Is it so wrong for me to desire you? That started back in Henderson’s office. It was instant, as soon as I put my hands on your arms. Ever since then the feeling has gotten stronger. I admit I’m very protective of innocent people. I admit I was furious when Wyatt called and told me Henderson had you trapped in his office. I admit I could tell from the way you cringed when he yelled that something else had happened to you. But I honestly believe it’s more than that. I haven’t had an uncontrollable hard-on since I was a kid. I have never made any sort of advance to any of the other women I’ve been in the position to protect. You’re the only one who’s ever done this to me. I don’t want to scare you more by telling you all this but since I already blurted that out earlier and I intend to be nothing but honest with you. I thought it best to admit that I want to keep you permanently. I can’t help it, Abby. You make me feel things and want things that it’s entirely too soon to think about. There’s no logic involved here, just raw emotions reacting to you being near me. Hell, I suspect I’d be going through the same thing if I’d met you at Harry’s restaurant if I asked to meet the pastry chef after enjoying some delicious treat you made.” He stopped when he saw Abby’s frown.

  “This is too much for me to think about right now.”

  “I know and I’m sorry. I don’t mean to overwhelm you but I didn’t want you to wonder about what I’d said. I don’t want to make you tense. Especially since you seemed to be a little more relaxed.”

  “I was starting to feel better.”

  “And I ruined it.”

  “No. I’m so confused.”

  “I know you are but try not to think right now. Lie down and let me rub your neck again. Forget about everything but the feel of my hands.”

  “Why are you doing this?”

  “Because I care. I hate that you’re hurting. I hate that he hit you.” Jesse traced a large bruise on her right side. “I hate that he kicked you. Yes, Abby, I can tell that this one was caused by a kick. You’re lucky you don’t have any broken ribs but you already know that. I am so furious with him right now I would do something stupid if he were here. I don’t know how much you saw in Henderson’s office when I got there but if you noticed, I should assure you that I am quite capable of defending myself. I make it a strict policy not to go after anyone, even if they deserve it, but I would make an exception for the guy who did this to you. I wouldn’t even think about it. I’d inflict as much pain as I could and someone would need to pry me away from him. But I do know right from wrong and I do know violence against him won’t take any of his damage away from you. I give you my word I won’t go after him unless he shows up and tries to hurt you in front of me.”

  “I believe you.” Abby lowered her hands to his shoulders. “Jesse?”

  “What is it?” he asked when she fell silent.

  A tear slid down her cheek as she seemed to debate with herself. “I-I don’t want to take advantage of you but… Will you hold me? Just for a minute?”

  Instead of answering, Jesse pulled her close, wrapping his arms securely around her while making sure he avoided her bruises. He turned his head so his mouth wasn’t between her breasts. He couldn’t restrain a sigh as she tightened her arms, forcing his cheek against her nipple. He quickly closed his eyes to block out the view of her other nipple, mere inches from his mouth. When her body was racked by her sobs, he carefully shifted her onto the bed next to him. Jesse let her cry, sensing that this had been building for some time. How badly had she been treated? And how long had it been going on? When Abby pressed herself closer and slid her leg between his, Jesse moved one on top of hers. She seemed to need as much contact as she could get. It had seemed almost as if she expected him to refuse when she asked to be held. Didn’t anyone give this woman any
affection or comfort?

  Abby’s tears slowed to a sniffle before stopping altogether. “Better?” Jesse asked when she tilted her head to look at him.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Shh,” he whispered as he traced lazy circles on her back. “You can cry on me any time you need to. And I’m more than willing to hold you too so don’t even think about apologizing for that. As you can tell, my body certainly doesn’t mind having yours against it.”

  “It felt so good being held. Like you really cared. Like I was safe. I didn’t mean to tease you.”

  “Hush. I do care and you are safe. You weren’t teasing me at all. You don’t have to do anything. I think I’ve gotten hard every time I got close to you today. I’ll probably come in my pants if you do ever tease me.”

  “How can you laugh like this?”

  “How can I not? If I got embarrassed or awkward by trying to hide my uncontrollable physical reaction to you, we’d both be very uncomfortable. Isn’t it better to acknowledge the effect you have on me and get us past that?”

  “I guess. Thank you.”

  “Not necessary. Entirely my pleasure.” He grinned at her. As he watched, her expression changed to reflect the same desire he was feeling.

  “Jesse.” Abby sighed his name as she raised her lips to his. “Please,” she pleaded for a kiss.

  Jesse gave in. He lowered his mouth to hers. When her lips parted, his tongue swept into her mouth. Abby was trembling in his arms, as their tongues danced. She tried to deepen the kiss by shifting against him. Jesse could feel her nipples through his shirt. Slowly, he eased his lips from hers and pulled her face against his neck. They were both breathing heavily as she struggled, trying to get back to his mouth.

  “Abby, stop,” Jesse begged. “I can’t do this. Not now. Not like this. You know that. I promised. I can’t go back on that.”

  “But Jesse.” She struggled again so he would loosen his hold and let her look at him. “I wanted you to do that. I asked you to.”

  “I know, precious but I still won’t let us do that. I won’t take advantage of you, even if you think you want me to.” Abby tried to push away from him but Jesse kept her next to him. “Wait. Please listen. You’ve had an emotional day. You say you don’t understand why I want you. And don’t think that I don’t just because I stopped that from getting out of hand. Don’t you see? I do want you. So much I can’t let us do anything that will make you have second thoughts about getting to know me once your headache fades and you can think clearly again. I want more than a quickie with you. If we gave in now, it might be the one and only time we were together. I don’t know what is making you want sex at the moment but you deserve more than just sex. You’re a special woman and should be treated as such. It would be wrong of me to give in to the lust you inspire and disrespect you like that.”

  “Oh God.” Abby groaned and hid her face against his chest.

  “Nope. None of that either. No hiding. No embarrassment.”

  “But I just threw myself at you and you turned me down.”

  “Temporarily. Only until your mind is clearer and you’re sure you want this as much as I do. And if you decide you don’t, you have to promise to tell me. I won’t be offended. I also won’t disappear on you. I’ll stick around and hope that someday you’ll change your mind and want me again.”

  “So you’re not really rejecting me?”

  “Hell no! I’m showing restraint. Postponing this until your migraine goes away. If you still want me then, you got me.”

  “You’d really screw around with me? Even though I look like this?”

  “I don’t think I like the way you just called it screwing around because I believe it would be more than that with you. Abby, how is it that you think you look?”

  She hid her face again and shook her head. He could feel her stiffening instantly. “Hey, Ab? Let’s hold off on this until you’re rested. Okay? Let’s go back to the plan of having a long talk later. I’ll need your full attention and I know I don’t have it now.” She nodded. “Good,” he sighed. “Damn, you feel so good against me.” Abby gasped and peered at him again. “Oops, I shouldn’t have said that. Kind of goes against everything I was just saying. But I won’t deny it. You do feel good in my arms. Too good at the moment. Makes me want to strip and feel your skin touching mine.” She giggled. “Do you have any idea how difficult it was for me not to lick your nipple when you put your arms around me? Christ, woman, you’re so tempting and I can’t do a damn thing about it.”

  “Jesse?” She chewed her bottom lip, making him groan internally. “I like holding you too. Will you rub my neck again? It really was making me feel better.”

  “Of course.” He hugged her. “You’re not just saying that?”

  “No. You told me I didn’t have to do things like that with you.”

  “You don’t. Scoot over and stretch out again. I’ll get some more ice.” He smiled broadly. “Thanks, Ab. I’m glad to be able to help.”

  Jesse caressed her even after she fell asleep. He couldn’t stop touching her skin. She was so soft. Her skin was so creamy. Whoever the jerk was she used to be with had messed with her self-image big-time. It was easy to see she wasn’t comfortable with her own body. If he got the chance he’d show her what his opinion of it was. So what if it wasn’t the fashion industry’s definition of perfect? So what if she was heavier than some misguided people thought women should be? She was round and cuddly. She fit perfectly in his arms and he knew without a doubt that he’d fit perfectly inside her. Her breasts would fill his hands and mouth with some left over, just the way he liked it. All he had to do was make her see the way she made him feel and maybe she’d relax more with herself. He would worship every inch of her if she made the same offer again. And damn that kiss had been hot! It would have been so easy to give in to their lust and follow where she was leading. But Jesse knew he had done the right thing. She was worth more than the impression that would have left her with. If he had any hope of staying with her, he couldn’t treat her like a once-and-done roll in the sheets. No, Abigail Jessica James was the woman he’d been waiting for. Now that fate had led him to her, he had to proceed cautiously. He didn’t want to go through anything like Brett and Andie just had. He’d go slowly but determinedly and catch her right away. He’d treat her as the special woman she was and keep her from the start.

  Chapter Six

  Jesse used the time Abby slept to shave. He saw the slight mark his stubble left on the delicate skin of her breast when she had cuddled him against her. Since he hoped to hold her again after Alyssa left, he wanted his face smooth. He vowed it would be against nothing other than her cheek but he still didn’t want to scrape her.

  “Abby.” Jesse stretched out next to her and kissed her shoulder. “Abby, precious, Alyssa’s going to be here soon. I know you don’t want to wake up any more than I want to disturb you but you need to.” He nuzzled her neck. “Ab? I’m sorry but you can go right back to sleep as soon as she’s done.”

  “Mm.” Abby snuggled against his warmth. Amazingly she seemed perfectly at ease with him. Jesse could tell when Abby finally realized that the hand on her back was real, just like the mouth on her shoulder. “No!” she screamed, instantly terrified as she jerked awake.

  “It’s Jesse, Abby,” he whispered. “Remember me? Jesse. We met after we got crossed at the airport this morning. You came back to the hotel with me so I could help with your migraine.” He kept talking but didn’t move.

  Finally her eyes focused. “Jesse?” she asked, her lips quivering.

  “Yes, that’s me. Jesse.”

  “Jesse,” she cried as she reached for him.

  Jesse waited until Abby had her arms around him before moving to hold her. “Shh, you’re okay. You’re safe. I’m taking care of you and I won’t let anything happen to you. Not ever.”

  “I thought I was dreaming again. Then I didn’t know where I was or who you were.”

  “I understand. I scare
d you. I probably shouldn’t have licked your shoulder to wake you up but it was uncovered and looked so tasty. I didn’t think how you’d react to a strange man in your bed, nibbling on you in your sleep. I should have just called your name from over there."

  “I’m sorry. I…”

  He put his finger against her lip. “Don’t apologize. You’re obviously not used to being kissed awake. We’ll just have to stay in bed until you are. I certainly don’t object to touching you with my tongue.” He shifted his hips slightly. “See? That one little taste has me hard again.”

  Abby honestly smiled at him for the first time. The way her face lit up took his breath away. “Isn’t Alyssa coming soon? Maybe you should get away from me.”

  “She’ll be here in about ten minutes and why would I want to get away from you? I’m very happy right where I am.”

  “But she’ll see, um…”

  “Oh I’m sure she will. Does it bother you that another woman sees how much I desire you?”

  “Well, I, um, I don’t know.”

  “You’re so cute. Would it make you feel any better if I told you that Shane spent the first three months of their relationship in the same condition? Alyssa’s going to be amused not offended. Not that she’d let either show. She’s coming as my friend, yes, but she’s also very professional when she’s working. She’ll be too busy concentrating on making you comfortable enough so she can do her job to pay any attention to me. I’ll move if it really bothers you.”

  “I guess not. This never happened before.”

  “You’re kidding, right?” Jesse seemed so amazed he must have said the first thing that came to mind.

  “No. Men don’t want me.”

  “You obviously don’t pay enough attention. Or you don’t know the right men. When you smiled just now, your entire face sparkled. I already told you what I think of your breasts. And what man wouldn’t want to sink into you and feel your legs wrap around his waist, pulling him in deeper?”

  “Earl,” Abby answered before she gasped in shock.